I feel like I should regularly have more updates for you all. I mean, the exciting life of a breast cancer patient is never ending, right?!
Well. Not so much.
I have pretty much the most boring life ever, right now. But I’m okay with that.
And most days I worry or think about normal life junk more than breast cancer junk. Stuff like money. Where the hell does it all go and why don’t we have any? And my dog. Why does he shed SO MUCH? What if he secretly hates me? If I ever have babies will he hate them?!
But breast cancer is occasionally a part of these worries.
For instance, I wore the foam boob the other day because sometimes it’s just less.. hot. I went to the pet store to buy dog food and look at cute animals andsomeone got to witness my prostetic falling out and onto the ground. In the PET STORE. By the gerbils. He handled it well though. He was crouched down next to where it fell and just kinda did a double take at it on the ground, picked it up and handed it to me. Then we continued on with our conversation.
It was a beautiful moment, really.
But on the drive home my brain went haywire.
I’m wearing the foam boob for lots of boring clothes related and comfort related reasons. What if I lean down to hug an adorable child or seated adult? What if I go all sorority pose for a photo op and lean down a little too far?! What if I do these things and that boob just flies out?!
It’d be a memory…
But really. Sometimes it’s just hilarious.
The hot flashes are funnier, but I wont get in to that.
I wish the other side effects were as funny as the hot flashes. But I have yet to make a memory out of the joint and bone pain, the uterine pain or my constantly growing rear end.
Okay, that last one is just funny on its own.
But really, I know I’ve got it easy.
I had my check up the other day, and while I was the youngest and I got some pretty ridiculous looks… I was also the ‘healthiest’.
It’s okay, though. I didn’t feel left out.
I know we are all bald on the inside.